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We have several new additions to the Offers List, including new art, fics, and trinkets!

Also, thanks everybody - we have now reached $538 in donations for equality! HELP US REACH $800 BY JAN 1. :)

Please review the FAQs or message a mod with questions. Prices listed below are PER offering, so if there are 5 500 word drabbles by snarkyscorp for $3, that means each drabble is worth $3. Crossed-off items have already been claimed.

To claim a fic, artwork, or other, please respond with this copied/pasted HTML, filling out the claim completely so there are no errors. Once we have replied to your claim, Donate to the Cause of your Choice (please see our Userinfo) and email snarkyscorp@gmail.com with a receipt for confirmation.




Offers for Fics, Art, Knitted Items, & More!
  • abusing_sarcasm
    • 10 100 word fics, 1 month, $1
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw:AS/S, H/D, Trio, pretty much any Next Gen pairing. I'll take a stab at writing any pretty much any character. Slash/het/femslash. PWP, smut, silliness. I assume anyone who would want to buy me knows what I write...
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: Cross-gen unless both participants are over 18, same-gen under... 15 or so? Close incest (parent/child, sibling/sibling, etc. Cousins okay), anything involving bodily fluids/substances other than semen & spit, hardcore BDSM, non-con or dub-con, violence, mpreg, nothing too sad or mean or nasty. And no Snape in any sexual situations.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
        Other important information about your offering: I may end up being late, because I have a lot of stuff in my queue. But I always do what I say I'll do. :D
  • asnowyowl 
    • 5 handmade 7" snowman ornaments, $6 (please see info)
      • Sewn soft sculptural ornaments decorated with wood, beads, paint, and buttons. I will even personalize a wooden disc on each with whatever you would like written on it. And the shipping will be on me. Since no two are alike, the ones in the photo are only representative and each is a little different in size (please ignore the 2007 on the one, as it was made last year). But they are all at least 7" tall or more. See this image for an example.
        Buy can also choose between gray hat/scarf or red-black stripe.
  • dirty_darella
    • 1 Digital artwork (cell shading style, two character max), 1 week, $5
    • 3 Digital artworks (cell shading style, two character max), 2 weeks, $5
    • 1 2,500 word fic, 3 weeks, $10
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: Prefer Harry/Draco, but open to other pairings. Open to pretty much anything (minus squicks)
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: scat, vomit, heavy non-con, heavy violence, dark or death fics/artworks. I'm not a big fan of cross-generational pairings or het or femslash, but am willing to do it if it's really desired.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
  • hotarus_sister
    • 5 100 word fics, 2 weeks, $1
    • 5 1,000 word fics, 3 weeks, $8
    • 1 2,500 word fic, 2 months, $9
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: same-gen, past-gen, bdsm, underage (13+), het, dubcon, oral/anal/double, multi-partner, angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, crack!fic.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: I have no probem with yaoi (obviously), but I've never written it, so request it at your own risk. No incest, necro, next-gen.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
        Other important information about your offering: My best stuff usually involves the twins ^_~
  • la_dissonance
    • 1 500 word fic, 2 months, $3
    • 2 30-minute tablet artlets, 1 week, $3
    • 2 24-hour SPAG beta jobs, 3 months (**), $5
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: slash, femslash, rarepairs, crossgen, weasleycest
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: het, scat, mucophagy, parent/child incest. For art only: male nudity (sorry, just can't do it!), liquids
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
        Other important information about your offering For the beta jobs (if this is even a legit thing to offer!): I see this working as a gift certificate sort of deal, with the buyer redeeming it whenever they need some really fast beta work done. So the time needed to complete is really 24 hours, but there could be a 3-month-from-date-of-purchase expiration on the certificate if need be. I'm certified with PI, if that makes a difference to shoppers. ;)
  • lotus_lizzy
    • 2 1 1,000 word fics, 1 week, $8
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: Pretty much I can write anything, and any pairing. Seriously. Just name it, I'll do it.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: Of course there are a few things I will not do, like rape, dub - con, any sort of physical abuse. If you want bdsm I might have to do some research, and it might come out silly. So you might now want to ask me to write that.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
        Other important information about your offering: While I am willing to write anything, most of my fics have a sense of humor to them. So if you want something funny or fluffy, I'm your gal. I'll do serious, but it'll have a happy ending. And for those purchasing a short fic I am also willing to make it into a poem, if you like that sort of thing. :)
  • luvscharlie
    • 5 100 word fics, 2 weeks, $1
    • 5 500 word fics, 1 month, $3
    • 1 1,000 word fic, 2 weeks, $8
    • 1 5,000 word fic, 1 month, $15
    • 1 10,000 word fic, 3 months, $25
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: Any het pairing that does not include Snape or a death eater or Greyback. Any slash pairing that includes a Weasley and no Snape, death eaters or Greyback.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: Snape/anyone, Greyback/anyone, Fleur Delacour/anyone. Nothing too dark or hardcore, though it takes quite a bit to squick me.
        Highest rating you will write/draw:NC-17
        Other important information about your offering: In my opinion I do best when writing smut. It is what I'm most comfortable with. I do best at het, though I've done some slash, and have no opposition to it or femme slash.
  • nolagal
    • 10 100 word fics, 2 weeks, $1
    • 5 4 500 word fics, 2 weeks, $3
    • 5 1,000 word fics, 2 weeks, $8
    • 1 2,500 word fics, 1 month, $9
    • 1 Mosaic Mirror (10"x10", your choice of HP House colors), 2 months, $25
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you’ll gladly write/draw: All pairings, prefer next-gen, cross-gen slash but will do my best on any pairing.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won’t touch with a ten foot pole: Heavy BDSM, Scat, waterplay, chan (under 15), non-con (dub-con fine), blood play, bestiality
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
        Other important information about your offering: I can email pictures of similar mirrors. I haven't done a HP one before.
  • rainy_labyrinth
    • 2 1000 word fics, 3 months, $8
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: Tom RiddlexHarry, SiriusxLupin, SnapexLily, ScorpiusxAlbus Severus, HarryxLuna, HermionexLuna, FredxGeorge, James Potter(the first!)xSnape, SnapexHarry, JamesxAlbus Severus, incest, dub-con, bloodplay, genderswap, mpreg, shota (as young as 12 only!). I can write het, slash, or femslash (obviously), and I'm generally flexible with who should top and who should bottom. I enjoy doing fluff and humor, as well as crack, but I also love darker fics.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: Scat, watersports, vomit, bestiality, deathfics, extreme self-harm, drug use.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: PG-13
        Other important information about your offering I may be able to finish the fics earlier than 3 months, but I just like to give myself enough time to finish them. I work better that way. ;)
  • ricevellus
    • 10 100 word fics, 7-10 days, $1
    • 5 500 word fics, 7-10 days, $3
    • 1 1,000 word fic, 4-5 days, $8
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: Severus/Harry is my favourite. As is Ron/Draco(or any Malfoy for that matter). I enjoywriting crossgens, hurt/comfort fics, dubious/non-con fics... And my favourite length to write are 100 word drabbles. Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: Anything with Voldemort. I'm cool with young Tom Riddle, but I can't actually write anything with "I'm a reincarnated babysnake" Voldemort. Closest I can get to is having him watch, or something. Other than that, I really don't have any boundaries.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
        Other important information about your offering: I reallyreallyreally like writing Severus/Harry. :: nods sagely ::
  • slytherinswench
    • 10 500-1,000 word fics, 1 month, $5
    • 5 1,000-2,500 word fics, 1 month, $10
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: I only have on squick I refuse to write. Otherwise, everything else is fair game. It is impossible to offend me.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: Nothing with participants under the age of 16, please. Otherwise, anything your darling heart desires, I can do. There is no kink or pairing that I can't write but for what is stated above.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
  • snarkyscorp
    • 10 100 word fics, 1 month, $1
    • 7 500 word fics, 1 month, $3
    • 5 1,000 word fics, 1 month, $8
    • 1 2,500 word fics, 2 months, $10
    • 1 5,000 word fic, 3 months, $15
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: incest, ageplay, underaged (12+ please), het, slash, femslash, dubcon, nearly EVERY pairing imaginable (no limits, really!). I'm best at slashing Albus Severus, Scorpius, Harry, Draco, Teddy, and James II, but I've written Dumbledore/Albus before so nothing really scares me too badly. xD
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: I suck at 'normal' stuff like fluff, ron/hermione, sirius/remus, but even that I will attempt for this cause! Other stuff I hate: foot fetish, toilet stuff, under 12, rape, beastiality (unless we're talking animagi...), creature fics
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17!
        Other important information about your offering: I'm known for writing slash and taboo stuff, so I loves me a challenge, yar!
  • supergreak
    • 10 1,000 word fics, 1 month, $8
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: Fluff. Anything next gen, involving DA members, or Reumus Lupin. Happy endings. Well, just about anything, if you give me a good idea. For instance, I never thought about writing Blaise Zabini before I got Henry the Eighth stuck in my head...
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: I suck at everything snarkyscorp likes... Incest, cross-gen, femmeslash, necrophilia, scatplay/watersports, ANGST
        Highest rating you will write/draw: R, with a nice fade to black.
        Other important information about your offering: Hear a song and say, "Hey! That would make an interesting story!", but don't want to write it yourself? I offer on demand, feel-good, laughter-inducing shorts, 1000 words. Give me just about any random idea, song, quote, or t-shirt slogan, and I'll build a story around it. Since I write crack!fic, I can make exceptions if you are okay with your pairing getting mocked and ridiculed. In the most loving manner possible. Open to questions/ideas.
  • [info]sweetly_savage
    • 10 100 word fics, 1 month, $15
    • 500 word fics, 1 month, $3
    • 2 1,000 word fics, 1 month, $8
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: I'm mostly comfortable with the teachers, but I could try any pairing. I can do het, slash, or gen.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: Incest, non-con, pedophilia.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
        Other important information about your offering I can write Minerva McG the best, but I've done almost all the adults at one point or another.
  • teprometo
    • 5 500 word fics, 1 month, $3
    • 1 1,000 word fics, 1 month, $8
    • 1 5,000 word fic, 3 months, $15
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: Harry/Draco, James II/Albus S/Teddy in any configuration, next gen pairings, cross gen, slash, tragedy, parselsmut, polyjuice smex, genderbending, dubcon, 14+, Tom Riddle timefuck, incest (but not parent-child), mpreg (I've never done it before...), other stuff
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: gen, het, femmeslash, Weasleys in sexual roles (I will and would love to write James II and Albus S, though.. they're hardly Weasley...), Lucius, Severus, Old folks (e.g. Dumbles and Minerva...), poop/pee/vomit, snowballing, feet, bestiality, creature fic... I'm not the girl you want for BDSM, either.
        Highest rating you will write/draw:NC17
        Other important information about your offering My "won't touch with a ten foot pole" list is really just stuff I've never done and am not sure I could pull off well. But if you want it and you're donating money to a good cause, I will do my best with anything you throw at me.
  • themarisa
    • 1 1,000-2,000 word fic, 1 month, $8
    • 1 10,000+ word fic, 3 months, $28
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: Harry/Draco, Harry/Sirius, Harry/Ron, Draco/Blaise, Draco/Ron, Draco/Sirius, Sirius/Remus, Albus Severus/Scorpius, Harry/Scorpius, Draco/Albus Severus, Teddy/James, Teddy/Albus Severus, James/Scorpius, angst, wit, snark, blood play, BDSM, no issues with preference for top or bottom of any pairings.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: NO FLUFF, no flanst, no water sports, scat, or vomit play. No underage (5th year or higher please) and no Snarry. It squirks me. No understanding!Snape either...dick!Snape or nothing else.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17
        Other important information about your offering I'm doing this so that everyone can marry. Injustice takes many forms, this is something I cannot tolerate.
  • woldy
    • 2 500 word fics, 2 months, $3
    • 1 1000 word fic, 2 months, $8
    • 1 2,500 word fic, 3 months, $10
      • Kinks/clichés/things/pairings you'll gladly write/draw: femslash, slash, Pansy/Ginny, Remus/Sirius, Marauders in general, threesomes, smut, humour, consensual BDSM, snark.
        Squicks/clichés/things/pairings you won't touch with a ten foot pole: noncon or dubcon, incest, het (except in a threesome), underaged smexin, scat or watersports, beastiality, darkfic, heavy angst, mpreg or anything with kids, any Death Eater (except Draco or Snape) /anyone, Hagrid, house elves, teacher/student, Hermione/Ginny.
        Highest rating you will write/draw: NC-17 (for sex rather than graphic violence)
        Other important information about your offering I like writing smutty, fluffy, funny or bittersweet fic (possibly even combinations thereof) so let me know what sort of mood you'd prefer. Most of my fic have been Pansy/Ginny, or Remus/Sirius, but I'll try other pairings e.g. James/Sirius, James/Sirius/Remus, Hermione/Luna, Harry/Charlie, or I'd even have a go at Snape/Neville (yes, it breaks my no 'teacher/student' rule but I'll make this one exception).
Please see our Userinfo or This Post for banners for Authors, Artists, and those who have donated to help us raise nearly $550!!!

 
 
 
 
 
 
LJ Username: la_dissonance


Participant's LJ Username: woldy


Offering: 1 1000 word fic

Price: $8


and


LJ Username: la_dissonance


Participant's LJ Username: dirty_darella


Offering: 1 digital artwork

Price: $5


along with


LJ Username: la_dissonance


Participant's LJ Username: nolagal


Offering: 1 500 word fic

Price: $3

Yay! All 3 are yours. Email me your receipt, etc. ;) You know the drill. <3
LJ Username: cleo_jay
Participant's LJ Username: dirty_darella
Offering: 1 digital artwork
Price: $5

and

LJ Username: cleo_jay
Participant's LJ Username: dirty_darella
Offering: 1 x 2,500 word fic
Price: $10

and

LJ Username: cleo_jay
Participant's LJ Username: lotus_lizzy
Offering: 1 x 1000 word fic
Price: $8
All 3 are yours! Please email me a receipt of your donation within 48 hours and I'll send you their contact info so you can get to work on fics and art. ;) Thanks for donating!
LJ Username: snarkyscorp
Participant's LJ Username: dirty_darella
Offering: 1 digital artwork
Price: $5
LJ Username: utteramusement

Participant's LJ Username: dirty_darella

Offering:
2 Digital artworks (cell shading style, two character max), 2 weeks, Price:
$5

Emailing payment in an hour or so ^^
Errr this is what happens when you copy and paste! I meant to say "oneDigital artwork." I'll re post this is you want.

Also, payment sent! ^^
hehe no worries! Got it and got your receipt too but I'll email later with her contact info.
LJ Username: bryoneybrynn

Participant's LJ Username: dirty_darella


Offering: 1 digital artwork Price:$5

<3 Tis yours!